There’s a secret a lot of guys won’t speak. To speak it goes against the guy code. And it’s this. “I can’t be weak.” And often a man doesn’t know he holds this belief until he hits rock bottom in his relationship. Until he actually feels weak. It’s only then that he realizes how much time and energy he put in to avoid a reality […]
Well, we’re in the homestretch of the election season now. And typically, the word “homestretch” has a sense of comfort to it. We’ve done the hard work. And now we can relax. And yet when it comes to the election, it’s quite the opposite. We’re in the homestretch of all the craziness but there’s generally not a very relaxed mood […]
After years of marriage, I see a lot of men constantly answering to their wife. Her questions come daily. Did you call the doctor? Did you get the Comcast guy scheduled? Did you take out the garbage? Did you remember the kids have a half day on Tuesday? It reminds a man of what it was like to be a […]
It’s hard for a man to pinpoint. That exact moment when things flatlined in his relationship. Especially after so many years together. My client Michael wonders. When did it happen? He doesn’t know. And yet undeniably, there’s something missing in his relationship. A fire. A passion. An excitement. A desire for one another. Sex. He hungers for it. Do you feel something missing in […]
“She’s always coming at me with a charge. It’s like I have to take on her anger just to stay married to her.” James pauses and looks away for a moment. “Half of the time I’m not even sure what she’s angry about.” He throws his hands up in frustration. “The other day, she barked at me because I didn’t secure […]
“I can’t be me without her freaking out on me,” my client Tim said to me. Wow, I thought, that sounds tough and I felt like that once upon a time. Does your partner ever freak out on you? Maybe you said one thing and she misinterpreted it to mean something else. Or you tried to do something you thought was kind and then […]
A guy wants sex. His wife doesn’t. He asks himself, “What’s the point of being married if I can’t have sex with my own wife? Will it be like this forever?” He feels trapped. Have you ever felt trapped like this in a sexless relationship? I have. I even went to a sex addiction therapist at one point in my […]
Let’s say you have relationship problems. Where’s the first place you might turn? Likely, it’s a therapist. That makes sense. There are lots of therapists out there. A dude assumes he’s got stuff to work out. But when it comes to fixing his relationship problems, therapy often falls short for most men. Why do guys often struggle in therapy? In short, […]
A guy complains that his wife never wants to have sex. He’s a good guy who loves his wife a lot. He strives to be kind, considerate, and loving. Is he doing something wrong? “She’s just shut down. It’s hard to be with a woman who doesn’t like sex,” he says. I relate. Years ago, in my marriage, I thought my […]
A man walks delicately around his partner. In any moment, she might reprimand him. It’s a pattern in their relationship. In reaction, he thinks, If only she’d give me some peace of mind. If only she’d stay out of my shit, not be after me so much, then I could rest, then I could be ok. He rolls out of bed in […]
