The internet is flooded with tactics for men on how to fix their marriage.

Yeah, that’s right fix it. Guys are hungry for a fix.

And so they hear things like…

Be the alpha male and take charge of things.

Don’t let her neuroses rock your calm masculinity.

Get her to do what you want with your clarity.

The problem is all these approaches are transactional.

And you’re dealing with a relational problem.

You can’t use a hammer when you need a screwdriver.

Do you want to improve your relationship?

Relationship requires a whole different set of strategies and tactics than a transactional mindset – you do A, then I’ll do B.

Relationships require us to go deeper within ourselves to the source of why the problems are happening in the first place.

It’s time to ask yourself…

1. Why are you trying to make her happy?

2. Why do you not speak up for your wants and needs?

3. Why do you struggle to set healthy boundaries with her?

To get to the root of the answers, you must go underneath the hood of your relationship to something big, scary and unconscious.

And until you deal with it, few strategies, if any, will fix your marriage.

What is this big scary unconscious thing?

It’s called the mother wound.

Every man has it.

But fears being seen like a child for acknowledging it.

Ironically, not dealing with it keeps him a child with his partner.

In a nutshell, the mother wound speaks to how a man’s relationship with his mother impacts his relationship with all women.

That’s right.

Your nervous system was programmed at a young age to please the first woman in your life, avoid her, or hate her.

Until you’ve done the work of integrating your mother wound, you will project it onto your wife or partner and it will poison your relationship.

Do you want to actually transform your relationship and not just fix it?

Discover how in the video below to get to the deeper root causes of the challenges you experience with your partner.

Most of what you can do for your marriage or relationship is work on yourself.

Transform who you’ve become in the relationship.

You change and then she’s much more likely to change.

Take the first step. Shoot me a quick email.

Stay Strong & Be Relational,
Stu

P.S. Join a band of relational warriors – a small group of men – meeting online every Tuesday at 12pm ET on the Men’s Relationship Tools calls.

First call is free. Reply to get a zoom link.