Imagine. Your marriage is on the rocks.

You experience your wife as a bully or maybe she’s withdrawn and unwilling to work on your marriage.

She puts you at the bottom of her list. Or maybe she’s sexually closed.

You’ve hit rock bottom. You can’t go on like this. Think about your options. Ask yourself…

Can I save my marriage? Or do we need to divorce?

It’s a scary place to be. I’ve been there myself and have coached hundreds of men who were also there.

So… what do you do?

Often when a guy thinks about staying, he’s at a loss about how to improve things. And yet when it comes to leaving, he’s concerned about his kids. He wonders…

Will my kids be OK?

In his mind, a man may even get to the point of revealing A DARK SECRET. A secret that weighs on him heavily.

He may speak it to his buddies, in the bar or at the office. To get it off his chest.

Or he may just harbor it within. A thing he’s afraid to admit or speak out loud. Something he’d be ashamed of if his kids heard.

He thinks… I love my kids but I can’t stand my wife.

Have you ever thought this?

Maybe it’s something else. Maybe it’s that she’s crazy or she’s a bully.

If you have such thoughts, what do you do with them?

It can feel good to get things out in the open with others. To not hold the burden alone. But most men lock it up and marinate in shame.

Regardless, what’s buried within is a man hiding out. Justifying his current reality where he’s stuck. Amplifying his shame at failing in his marriage.

Do you feel stuck in your marriage?

If so, do you hide out in beliefs that keep you stuck?

She’s crazy. She’s always freaking out. Love my kids, can’t stand my wife.

These are all ways of hiding out. Not just from her. But from yourself and your power. Your power to change things.

Shame aside, there are millions of men all over the world in your situation. And hiding out is a natural self-protection mechanism.

But you can do better. And that starts with tapping into your desire to do what’s best for your kids.

What IS best for my kids?

When you think about your kids and their future, you want to make sure they’re ok and happy. You love your kids. Of course, you do.

If your marriage is stressed, it’s common to wonder…

Will my kids be OK if we divorce?

This is a big unknown. All of us guys have heard horror divorce stories.

Women turning the kids against dad. Seeking enormous alimony settlements. Maybe even attempting to cut off all kid contact.

This can play into your worst fears. And when in fear, you don’t make good decisions. You don’t frame things for your greatest outcome. You settle.

And so a man flips to…

Should we stay together for the sake of the kids?

But again, here, a man is settling. He’s staying in a weak position. He’s avoiding the heart of the problem.

Because what he really needs to ask himself in this moment is a bigger question.

A question that a man rarely asks because he can’t see outside of the box he’s stuck in. He’s too in the weeds.

And it’s a question that takes you back to your kids. Your heart and soul. What and who you’d die for. Where regardless of the state of your marriage, you still have a ton of skin in the game.

And so, ask yourself, whether you stay married or not…

What kind of relationship am I modelling for my kids?

Is staying married as is serving my kids?

Am I the best dad I can be to my kids, drained in apathy or animosity with their mom?

What if working on your marriage (not just staying married) was the best thing you could do for your kids?

What if you could be in a position to say “I love my kids and I love my wife?”

In the video below, I speak to the ONE BIG WAY to get there, to be the dad you want to be, and create the greatest outcome possible for your kids.

A lot of guys compartmentalize their kids from their marriage. They think they can hide things from their kids.

They try to put the marriage in a separate box where the kids can’t see.

If you do this, here’s a secret. You’re in denial.

Get real. You were a kid once and knew when things were rocky with your parents. You saw it all – a tone, a look, a movement from one of your parents.

Let’s be clear. Your kids are aware of the shitty state of your marriage. Kids pick up on everything. They have super-sonic energy radars.

Don’t let your kids down and instead, start now being the dad you wish you had.

Explore what’s possible for you. Connect with a bunch of powerful guys playing big in their marriages in my next Men’s Relationship Tools call this Tuesday at 12pm ET.

And for daily relationship tips and action items, join my private men’s only Facebook Group Men Mastering Relationship.