“My wife gets easily worked up about stuff,” says Robert, a software entrepreneur in his late forties. “And I feel like I have to take it on. I’m that guy, you know, who fixes it. “And to be honest, I’m tired of it. It seems like it never stops. Whether it’s about the kids, her work, my behavior. She’s freaking […]
Here’s a story about a guy, a CEO, who struggled to go after what he wanted with his wife. All that changed with one simple question, which I’ll offer to you momentarily. Up front, people tend to think CEO’s have it made. They’ve achieved success. They’ve made their money. But the reality is they’re humans, just like you and me. […]
Your blind spot. The place that you can’t see between your rearview and sideview mirror. You check it when you can. But every once in a while, you get lazy. You go to make that lane change, without checking your blind spot… And then BAM! You smash into something. And you realize, it was that damn blind spot. What the […]
We think we’re not enough. It’s why we don’t ask for what we want in marriage. And within the not enough script inside of us, subtle psychological mechanisms are at work– in how we repeat old relational patterns, how we sabotage ourselves, and how we neglect our most precious relationships. Freud called it the thanatos “death drive,” the opposing force […]
“There’s this thing,” a client says to me. Mark looks up to the heavens, as if he’ll find the word there. He’s 51. “It’s happening with me and Felicia. I’m not sure what to call it. It’s… a lining up of sorts. Love… and yet something else…” He looks up again. “It’s like she knows what I’m thinking. Not like […]
To the parts of you that fear being seen. Come with me. I will free you. Lead you home. Be your beacon. Be your light. I will see you. Who speaks? When you go deep into your heart… When you touch the place within… Where you are no longer willing to hide? When your heart aches to be heard… When you withhold your precious you… […]
A share like this is vulnerable for me. I’m not the type to seek personal support online. And yet I seek connection, more than support. I was in a really dark place, about 10 days ago. Anxiety, panic, depression. A sense of the bottom torn out from under me. A hysterical undercurrent of – Would I live? I’m undergoing a […]
Sovereignty — I talk a lot about it. It’s the crux of my own personal path. It’s what we seek in a partner, often not even knowing it. “He’s his own man.” “She’s a powerhouse.” “You really know how to love.” It’s that sense of being with someone solid, grounded, and consistent. We know where we stand. We can relax […]
Ah, to fall in love… the spell… the fireworks.. the endorphins…the sex.. the fullness we feel with the One. How sweet it is to be in love with you. You complete me. I am someone else with you. The escape from self infuses us with a euphoria and joy like no other. Poets, romantics, and dreamers have written about it […]
There’s this dynamic I see often between couples. She nags. He gets angry. She feels like she’s with a child. He feels like he’s with his mother. She doesn’t trust him with little things. He placates her by doing what he can. She wants him to be more responsive. He wants to run. And in the space between, they lose […]
