Jake’s a big-shot engineer. An engineer who travels the country and lectures internationally. The rock star of engineers who trains other big-shot engineers. He’s brilliant. But like so many other successful men I speak with, his marriage is falling apart. Jake can’t reconcile himself to his own failure at home. He loves his kids, but he refuses to fully acknowledge […]
Below is a letter a married man struggling with “not enoughness” sent to his wife recently, inspired by a video of mine. Dear Cindy*, There is something that has been weighing on my heart that I want to share with you. I often find myself grappling with the feeling that I’m not enough for you. Yes, it relates to our […]
“I feel like I’m in the doghouse with my partner.” Ever hear a guy say that? That’s code for I’m not getting any sex. Have you been in the doghouse with your partner? Are you there now? Every month, I hear from a handful of guys who say they’re not sexually fulfilled in their relationship. They act like they’ve been […]
Most of us have our own version of this story. Do you? You met your wife x number of years ago. At first, it was great. Sweet connection. Wonderful sex. The urge to merge. You got engaged and then married. And then you had a family and things changed over time. You were no longer each other’s priority. Kids came. […]
Serve, protect, provide. This is the mantra, conscious or not, that drives the behaviors of many married men. Ultimately, most men want to make their wives happy. So in that effort, he’s willing to overlook a lot of challenging behaviors from her. Do you seek to make your wife happy? If so, that’s great. But ask yourself for a moment, […]
Dave was a big-shot commercial developer. Multimillion-dollar deals and big financial risks. Yet at home, he was risk-averse, often crippled by the slightest rejection from his wife. In 15 years of coaching married men, I’ve seen this dynamic of financial success and marital failure in a man many times. But with Dave, it was extreme. His wife didn’t seem to […]
Let’s face it. We men want to make our woman happy. In that effort, many of us fall into a pattern. Ask yourself if this pattern applies to you. Your partner complains about your behavior or who you are. You get the message that you’re not enough for her. And you may even feel like you’ve failed her. You don’t […]
It’s a silent epidemic. Guys getting beat up in their marriages. Trounced emotionally and verbally. It happens behind closed doors. Of course, it does. It doesn’t fit the politically correct public narrative of men as perpetrators, so it stays under the lid. Are you getting beat up in your marriage? It’s also concealed because guys want it that way. As […]
Three scripts from three men about their sex challenges with their wives. “She hasn’t touched me in weeks. She never initiates sex.” “It’s like she doesn’t want me anymore. I feel hopeless.” “I want it and I want it now. I’m sick of this shit.” Are you frustrated with your sex life? I have a lot of empathy for men […]
Jake’s a big-shot engineer. An engineer who travels the country and lectures internationally. The rock star of engineers who trains other big-shot engineers. He’s brilliant. But like so many other successful men I speak with, his marriage is falling apart. Jake can’t reconcile himself to his own failure at home. He loves his kids but he refuses to fully acknowledge […]
