Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. Ever heard the expression? If so, then you may understand like my client Mauricio did, that in relationship, the saying applies doubly so. Mauricio would get into an argument with his wife and then for hours afterward, he would beat himself up. He’d spiral into fear about how his wife would deprive him of […]
Jim was a high-powered business guy. He had a talent for making big deals happen. He was a rock star at work but man, did he get his boat rocked when it came to his marriage. Do you experience success at work but failure in your marriage? For my client Jim, that was a clear yes. At work, he had […]
Fear. An emotion that goes underground for most men at a young age. It happened to me when I was just 5 years old. It was then that I first learned fear wasn’t okay for a boy. I remember my older brother, who was eight at the time, said to me, “What are you afraid of, you little baby? Little […]
“My wife always has to be right.” “She doesn’t respect my opinion.” “My wife always gets the last word in.” These are the exact words I heard from multiple men in the last few months. If you can relate to any of these statements, it’s likely you’re with a strong-spoken woman. Do you feel as if your wife has to […]
Men. Many of us often cruise along in our marriage. As long as we’re having sex occasionally and the house isn’t on fire, we’re fine with how things are. We don’t think much more about our marriage. Then there’s another group of guys in the marital battle zone. No sex. The house is on fire. And in response, they try […]
Ben was a successful account executive in his company. A fierce competitor. He pushed hard to go after what he wanted. He was a great connector when it came to people. At work, he was confident and capable. He loved what he did. Yet at home, it was a totally different story. At home, he lived in fear. Fear that […]
In marriage and relationship, at a certain point, things flatline. It’s inevitable. It is not cynical. It’s just how it is. At a certain point, we get so safe in the relationship that we stop aspiring towards what lights us up. And often we can’t put our finger on when that happened. Then one day, we live into a future […]
Eight years ago, I was 44 years old, married 17 years, with a 15-year-old son. I’d been through many death and life cycles in my marriage. I was about to go through another one. My wife and I were in the kitchen, talking about what we should get my son for Christmas. She asked for my opinion. I brought my […]
“It’s been months since we´ve been intimate,” Bob says to me. “I try to go near her and she pulls away. What the hell? This is insane.” “This is my wife, the woman I committed to being monogamous with, and yet she won´t even let me touch her.” Do you struggle when it comes to intimacy with your wife? A […]
Every week I talk to guys with some version of this experience. I’ve been married to my wife for x number of years. I do A and she wants me to do B. I ask her what she wants of me and she says I should just know. After so many years together, I still don’t know what she wants […]
