Tag: men’s work

The Feminine In The Masculine

“The feminine in a man?” A big burly man says. His massive biceps dwarf his muscle shirt, as he lifts at the gym. “Ha, you got to be kidding me. Next thing you know, you’ll be asking me to be join the knitting club.” “That manly man ain’t so manly,” another man says, “if he’s afraid of his heart.” Ok, […]

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Be Right or Be Loved?

There’s one question that disarms couples in a moment of conflict. Prefer to watch me present live? The Conflict  John and Susan zoom in to me on video chat from South Carolina. John’s a high level executive with a steel company. And while he spends a lot of time at work, he’s aging and well aware that his home life […]

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Men, Tears, & Strength

A man cries. Something opens up in him. He can’t hold in his pain anymore. His heart hurts. His wife has left him. Or he has left her. Either way, he grieves. Men cry. I see this often in my work. Contrary to common belief, they are strong men. Very strong. Strong enough to… Access their sadness. Trust others to […]

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Focus On The Repair, Not The Damage

The Ideal Relationship — What’s it look like? Have you ever been in one?  When I’ve asked clients, they’ve said things like: We’re deeply connected. We stay open to one another. We never fight. Notice the last statement. Do you know couples who never fight? Anyone come to mind? Likely not. How about we change that last statement to “we navigate […]

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I Trust You To Keep Me Safe

“There’s this thing,” a client says to me. Mark looks up to the heavens, as if he’ll find the word there. He’s 51. “It’s happening with me and Felicia. I’m not sure what to call it. It’s… a lining up of sorts. Love… and yet something else…” He looks up again. “It’s like she knows what I’m thinking. Not like […]

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Unlock Your Precious Heart

To the parts of you that fear being seen. Come with me. I will free you. Lead you home. Be your beacon. Be your light. I will see you. Who speaks? When you go deep into your heart… When you touch the place within… Where you are no longer willing to hide? When your heart aches to be heard… When you withhold your precious you… […]

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The Darkness In Me & How It Affects My Relationship

A share like this is vulnerable for me.  I’m not the type to seek personal support online. And yet I seek connection, more than support. I was in a really dark place, about 10 days ago. Anxiety, panic, depression. A sense of the bottom torn out from under me. A hysterical undercurrent of – Would I live? I’m undergoing a […]

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Sovereignty: The Key To A Great Relationship

Sovereignty — I talk a lot about it. It’s the crux of my own personal path. It’s what we seek in a partner, often not even knowing it.  “He’s his own man.” “She’s a powerhouse.” “You really know how to love.” It’s that sense of being with someone solid, grounded, and consistent. We know where we stand. We can relax […]

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The Joy & Terror Of Losing Yourself in Relationship

Ah, to fall in love… the spell… the fireworks.. the endorphins…the sex.. the fullness we feel with the One. How sweet it is to be in love with you. You complete me. I am someone else with you. The escape from self infuses us with a euphoria and joy like no other. Poets, romantics, and dreamers have written about it […]

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The #1 Way We Mess Up Our Relationships

You’re a man. Or maybe you’re a woman. Or you’re non-binary. It doesn’t matter. You’re human. You do this thing – we all do – but nobody talks about it. And it’s the #1 way we screw up our relationships. Why doesn’t anyone talk about it? Well, it would likely be SEEN as bad news. We, humans, prefer good news […]

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