John was at the ledge. He’d been trapped in a “one down” dynamic with his wife for years. Nothing he could say or do was ever good enough for her. She seemed totally shut down to him. He missed the woman he first met, who had opened to him like a lotus flower. He was confused as to what to […]
Your marriage is like a ship. You and your wife are the captains. It is your responsibility to co-pilot the ship together. And yet after years together, both of you let go of the wheel. Have you captained the ship of your marriage? If not, in time the ship hits a channel of rocks. And yes, that’s why we say, […]
Sex. It’s often a big lack in a man’s life. Especially if he’s been married for many years. Is sex missing in your relationship? You may have reached a point where you’ve thrown in the towel on your sex life. It may not even be something you think much about anymore with your partner. Well, ok, you think about it. […]
“I’m gonna die here,” I thought, staring at the picture-perfect suburban yard. I washed dinner dishes at the sink in our family dream home, as I did most nights, trying to be a good guy, to support my wife who had chronic illness. I was that guy. Do you prioritize your wife’s well-being over your own happiness? I did. And […]
This was me once. It might be you. Your wife treats you like a second-class citizen. She belittles you. She acts as if you have little to offer her or your family. Does your wife ever belittle you? In response, you try to show up as your best. You’re a good guy who wants to contribute. And yet your efforts […]
Richard, a sales executive, speaks to me across the screen from New York. He’s exasperated. “She’s always freaking out. I’m tired of it. She’s fucking crazy.” Do you ever think your wife is crazy? Richard did. “I just want things to be OK, fluid. Every little thing becomes a big deal with her. Yesterday she freaked on me because I […]
“My marriage is falling apart,” Robert says. He pauses and sighs. “I fear divorce. I’m at a loss with what to do.” As a super-successful options trader, Robert is unaccustomed to not having the answers. “We’ve been married for years and somewhere, I don’t know exactly when, she shut down on me.” Has your wife shut down on you? Robert’s […]
When a man’s marriage tanks, he asks himself questions like… Can I continue to live like this? How can things change? What can I do about it? And in this place, your options can feel limited. You can easily feel trapped and resigned. Are you living out a life sentence in your marriage? If you’ve ever felt this way, it’s […]
Ever been in a fight with your wife and thought, Jeez, we’ve been having the same argument for 15 years? You didn’t do A, B, or C so many years ago, she says, then you didn’t do it again last week. You’re careless and all you think about is yourself and you’ll never change. Do you wonder, how did we […]
Here’s a crazy phenomenon I see with many married men. Are you this guy? A man walks into his kitchen to get a snack after working in his office. His wife walks into the kitchen. And bam, out of nowhere, she starts coming at him. “Hey,” she says, “you said you’d take care of the appointment for the kids. I never got […]
