She talks. I listen. She talks some more. I listen some more. On a good day, her words are about someone or something else and I can help her figure things out. On a bad day, her words are about me and what I don’t do right and what I do wrong. I want to do better but after a […]
She says, I’m not enough for her. She says, I don’t listen. And she says, I’m not present. Any guy knows that his wife is a master at picking apart who he is and what he doesn’t do. So much so, unlike anyone else in his life, that it’s her superpower or maybe better said, her shadow power. And while […]
Let’s face it. We men want to make our woman happy. In that effort, many of us fall into a pattern. Ask yourself if this pattern applies to you. Your partner complains about your behavior or who you are. You get the message that you’re not enough for her. And you may even feel like you’ve failed her. You don’t […]
Tony’s been married for 12 years. He’s lost his identity in his relationship. “Some days, I just want to hit the eject button. To just get out of this mess I’m in.” Tony doesn’t understand how he’s landed at the age of 46 into a functional life – work, pay the bills, take care of the kids – and a […]
Rick wants his wife to know her place and stop nagging him all the time. He believes inherently by being a man that he has a right to peace and quiet. He is the old-school masculine guy. Tom, on the other hand, tries to not upset his wife hoping that she’ll love him back. He believes if he upsets her […]
This is firsthand. I’ve been there. The brutal nature of feeling like the one person – your wife or partner – to whom you’ve limited your sexuality has closed the door on that part of your life. She’s no longer interested in sex. She says she can’t be physically intimate if she doesn’t first feel emotionally connected. Or she just […]
Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. Ever heard the expression? If so, then you may understand like my client Mauricio did, that in relationship, the saying applies doubly so. Mauricio would get into an argument with his wife and then for hours afterward, he would beat himself up. He’d spiral into fear about how his wife would deprive him of […]
My wife said A. I said B. We got into a fight. I got angry. I said some things I wasn’t proud of. We went to sleep that night on opposite sides of the bed. The next morning, I felt like a scared kid, afraid of even saying hello to her. Would she bark at me, ignore me, or something […]
Jim was a high-powered business guy. He had a talent for making big deals happen. He was a rock star at work but man, did he get his boat rocked when it came to his marriage. Do you experience success at work but failure in your marriage? For my client Jim, that was a clear yes. At work, he had […]
Fear. An emotion that goes underground for most men at a young age. It happened to me when I was just 5 years old. It was then that I first learned fear wasn’t okay for a boy. I remember my older brother, who was eight at the time, said to me, “What are you afraid of, you little baby? Little […]
