Tag: relationship

2 Characters Who Keep You Small

Withholds — it’s not a word often spoken between couples. And yet withholds are everywhere in relationship. Maybe you don’t speak a hard truth to your partner. Or maybe you don’t ask for what you need. Or maybe you don’t put the work you want to into your primary relationship (i.e. look at yourself, repair conflict, etc) These are withholds — places where you keep […]

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Focus On The Repair, Not The Damage

The Ideal Relationship — What’s it look like? Have you ever been in one?  When I’ve asked clients, they’ve said things like: We’re deeply connected. We stay open to one another. We never fight. Notice the last statement. Do you know couples who never fight? Anyone come to mind? Likely not. How about we change that last statement to “we navigate […]

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4 Relational Conflict Styles – Which One Are You ?

Conflict in relationship – it sucks. You know how it goes. She says this. He says that. She gets angry. He gets pissed. Something hurtful is said somewhere along the way. Both of you are triggered and feel really unsafe. Two individuals, supposedly together, spin down separate rabbit holes. Thoughts fly off the handle. Do I have a future with […]

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I Trust You To Keep Me Safe

“There’s this thing,” a client says to me. Mark looks up to the heavens, as if he’ll find the word there. He’s 51. “It’s happening with me and Felicia. I’m not sure what to call it. It’s… a lining up of sorts. Love… and yet something else…” He looks up again. “It’s like she knows what I’m thinking. Not like […]

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Unlock Your Precious Heart

To the parts of you that fear being seen. Come with me. I will free you. Lead you home. Be your beacon. Be your light. I will see you. Who speaks? When you go deep into your heart… When you touch the place within… Where you are no longer willing to hide? When your heart aches to be heard… When you withhold your precious you… […]

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Hiding Hard Feelings & How It Affects Your Relationship

First, thanks to those who reached out to me last week. I shared a vulnerable post and an outpouring of support, trust, and connection came my way. A few people asked me, “Are you ok? I am here for you.” Others said, “Thanks for sharing. This really helped me during a hard time.” And some said, “You’re really brave.” It touched […]

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The Darkness In Me & How It Affects My Relationship

A share like this is vulnerable for me.  I’m not the type to seek personal support online. And yet I seek connection, more than support. I was in a really dark place, about 10 days ago. Anxiety, panic, depression. A sense of the bottom torn out from under me. A hysterical undercurrent of – Would I live? I’m undergoing a […]

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Sovereignty: The Key To A Great Relationship

Sovereignty — I talk a lot about it. It’s the crux of my own personal path. It’s what we seek in a partner, often not even knowing it.  “He’s his own man.” “She’s a powerhouse.” “You really know how to love.” It’s that sense of being with someone solid, grounded, and consistent. We know where we stand. We can relax […]

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The Joy & Terror Of Losing Yourself in Relationship

Ah, to fall in love… the spell… the fireworks.. the endorphins…the sex.. the fullness we feel with the One. How sweet it is to be in love with you. You complete me. I am someone else with you. The escape from self infuses us with a euphoria and joy like no other. Poets, romantics, and dreamers have written about it […]

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The #1 Way We Mess Up Our Relationships

You’re a man. Or maybe you’re a woman. Or you’re non-binary. It doesn’t matter. You’re human. You do this thing – we all do – but nobody talks about it. And it’s the #1 way we screw up our relationships. Why doesn’t anyone talk about it? Well, it would likely be SEEN as bad news. We, humans, prefer good news […]

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